I am exhausted.
It’s been frustrating to work so hard and see my efforts bear little to no fruit. I was feeling the weight of reality this morning and decided to work things out with my Heavenly Father.
I perch on the edge of my couch, sipping my spinach smoothie. Earbuds crammed in my ears so I can’t hear Alex tuning his vocal cords downstairs.
“Dad, I am freaking exhausted.”
My Father sits across from me, His deep eyes looking into mine. “You’re trusting you and not me Katie-bug.” I tilt my head down and absentmindedly scribble words in my journal. They mean nothing to me. I just don’t want to look at His face as I speak.
A minute passes before I answer Him.
“So You’re telling me there is one more thing for me to do… lean on You entirely? I don’t even know how to do that!”
A small grin tugs at my Dad’s lips. My tone is super sassy and He knows it.
“Katie-bug, my burden is light. Just give me every worry and question. I will take care of them.”
“Easier said than done.” Sometimes I forget that I am talking to the King of the Universe. The One who made everything and understands everything. I shake my head and keep my eyes on the white pages, embarrassed.
My Father leans in, His eyes begging to meet mine. “Katie. I love you. Choose to give every worry to me.” He unfurls his fingers over mine and squeezes my hand. I yank back and catch a glimpse of His eyes, those multifaceted orbs I was trying desperately to avoid. They are wet with tears. He sees my struggle. He cares so much. Salty streams weave down my cheeks as He pulls me close to His chest.
His voice is deep and soothing. “Rest.” I let the journal slide from my lap and ballpoint pen clatter to the floor. I wrap my arms around His neck. He’s everything I’ve ever needed. Peace and warmth envelop me as I snuggle into His chest.
Trading the troubles of the world for His peace brings me home.
I learned a couple things from the above-mentioned conversation with God. Things that may help you in your journey to find rest.
Don’t give up on talking to God. Even when it feels like He isn’t listening, He is. He cares and wants to hear your concerns. He will deal with them, in His timing and way, when you give them into His hands. He longs to hear from you.
He has overcome the world. All the tough stuff you’re dealing with right now is not too big for God. This may sound cliche but choose to BELIEVE it. He will accomplish His purposes through you, even when you don’t feel like He can.
Our weakness is a good thing. His strength shines through us when acknowledge that He is the One on the throne. He uses our weak spots to shine His power to the world. When we allow Him to craft a masterpiece in us, it’s breathtakingly beautiful for the world to see.
It’s a season. Have hope in knowing life won’t be exhausting forever. Ask Father God what you can learn from this time and continue fighting the good fight. Before you know it, a new season will emerge. You will see the battle was worth your effort.
Keep pushing through! It’s going to worth your effort.
In His service, with much love and care,