“But who are you, a human being, to talk back to God? Shall what is formed say to the one who formed it, ‘Why did you make me like this?'”
I sink into my bed and snatch my phone from my cluttered bed stand. It’s nine o’clock and I am ready for some down time.
I tap Instagram and am inundated with the newest news. Shots of far-away lands, sloth babies and laughing women are all over the place.
It’s a happy place! Until…
I click on a profile. Boom. Long legs, slim torso, thin waist. Supermodel.
I scroll through the her shots.
Supermodel on the beach snapped in a moment of laughter. Supermodel with her arms around her gorgeous husband. Supermodel in her red hot Ferrari, driving it through Sunset Boulevard.
My stomach drops.
I am none of these things. I am not what the world would consider successful. I’m no Pop Star or Victoria Secret angel. You won’t see my name on L.A billboards.
I live in Lethbridge, drive a 2005 Toyota Corolla and shop at Wal-Mart. My legs aren’t long. My body isn’t thin. I don’t have the coolest clothes…
I am normal, average, vanilla, your grandma’s oatmeal. If you were a normal kid, you wouldn’t have wanted me for breakfast.
I swipe my phone off and sit in silence, my heart wrenching.
“Lord, why can’t I be like her? Why don’t I have what she does?”
Despite my blatant selfishness, His answer is gentle as a summer breeze. “What do you have Katie?”
I wrap my arms around my stomach, knowing the answer too well. “You.”
He smiles. “Yes.”
“But… to other people that doesn’t mean much.” I cringe as I say it.
His tone is serious. “Those people have nothing on me. I created them. What else have I made?” I think for a couple moments before answering.
“Butterflies, oceans, the human body and emotions, song, language, story, the animals… there’s too much to list.”
He nods and slips His hand over mine. “Focus on the beauty I have created in this world and am creating in you. You will be so enraptured that you’ll forget about your supposed insufficiency. Besides, I didn’t make you to be a god. Would you really want to be that, a stumbling block to other peoples’ joy and purpose?” I shake my head.
“It just sucks being a nobody.”
“Kiddo, you are a somebody. A somebody who was made for a different Kingdom. Don’t believe the lie that just because you aren’t on the cover of Time you aren’t valuable. You are changing the world in the way I have made you to. This earth wouldn’t be the same without you, no matter what others think.”
I close my eyes and breathe in His presence. After a few minutes, I sit up and push my phone into my drawer. I need to start focusing on what really matters, His voice, His face, His purposes. I sink into my pillow and cling to the sweet resonance of His truth, “you are changing the world.”
It can be difficult to remember we haven’t been placed on this planet for our own glory. I struggle with this reality almost every day but am slowly learning to run to Him when I feel insignificant, not accomplishments or my makeup drawer.
When you walk by a mirror today or are reminded of how you don’t measure up, just remember the sweet words He is speaking to your precious soul:
Daughter, you are worthy just as you are, no matter what you feel. Even when you don’t see it, you are changing the world in the way I have made you to.
You are designed to uniquely display my beauty.
I love you and have a purpose for you, a purpose greater than you could ever imagine.
It’s time for you to open your beautiful eyes, see truth and believe it.
With much love,
The Father and K.L Pezzutto