Gravel crunches beneath my feet as I sprint towards the park. My lungs are on fire, my muscles are stretched like taunt bungee cords, tightened to full capacity. One more step. I tell myself after my next laborious step. Just one more.
One step turns into two and two into three. I keep running. I keep pushing myself. In less than five minutes I, drenched in sweat, have reached my destination, finally. Gulping in large pockets of air I plop into the grass, taking no heed to the fact my sensitive skin will be covered in hives afterwords. I focus on my breathing and my accomplishment. As good as it feels to smash my running time I still can’t help but wonder, will my accomplishments ever be good enough?
I have been asking myself that question all week. Each time the response continues to remain the same: work harder, be better, get stronger, learn more, outsmart the pack.
Before the voices could lay claim to my mind I stop them.
I calculate my thoughts, spin them around then ask for the only opinion that truly matters, “Father, will I ever be enough?”
I shiver as beams of warm light filter across my cool skin. “You are enough Katie.” At His response a slight smile pulls at the corner of my mouth. He never fails to speak back to my heart and provide rest for my soul.
I slung my arm over my exhausted, twitching leg. “Please help me rest in your truth Abba.”
“Katie, when you are weary, burdened and laden with heavy situations come to me. Lean on me. Let me speak truth into your life. You are enough. You are enough and I am enough for you.”
I shiver as a cool breeze washes over my slick back.
“Thank you Abba.”
“I love you Katie.”
Peace washes over me as my Father and I sit here in silence. We listen to the echo of children’s laughter as it bounces across water and smell the freshly blossoming wild flowers. I am complete. I am perfect. I am loved, desired and wanted just the way I am.
I am home.
Are you agreeing with the lie of the enemy that you aren’t good enough? If you are please stop and take time to realize that lies have been spoken to you.
Trust me, you don’t have to have bigger boobs, a smaller waist, larger biceps or whatever crap society has told you you need in order to be enough. If you follow the pattern the world has laid out you will never be content. You will never be filled with joy, only longing.
Find your identity in Christ. Spend time with Him and ask Him who He is. Ask Him who you are to Him.
You won’t regret this… it may, in fact, completely change your life… just as it has changed mine.
With much love,